Tag Archive: video games


Video Game Crushes

Hey, it’s Valentine’s Day, so you know what that means! A whole day filled with lonely longing for a “be mine,” jealously watching that pretty blond get that stupid, cheesy-looking Valentine’s Day card from that super-hot guy, and holding your own, personal pity-party killing aliens in front of your TV (this works so much better than ice cream).

 

Okay, Valentine’s Day isn’t that bad. I’ve pretty much accepted by now that I just haven’t met the right guy. Today, I feel confident that I won’t get too annoyed over seeing someone obviously less attractive than me spend this special day with her gorgeous boyfriend.

 

 

Ahem, anyway, I thought Valentine’s Day might be a good day to discuss everyone’s video game crushes. I searched the Internets to find out who most gamers view as the top 10 hottest video game characters. After clicking on a page that lead me immediately to scantily clad digital women, I figured that I’d start over with the word “guy” in the search bar. Sorry guys, I’m not interested in turning this into a post with nothing but eye candy for men. You know how video game women are; even in the dead of winter, they’ll wear nothing but a bikini, no sweat (literally, hehe). Video game developers seem to think that a girl’s skin is more insulated than a polar bear with central heating.

 

Anyway, I visited blogs, forums, articles, and videos, even enduring a couple of those poorly made youtube AMVs, to discover the Internet’s view of the top 10 hottest video game guys.

10. Number 10 is the mysterious Auron from Final Fantasy. Actually, I have no idea if he is mysterious or not, because I’ve never played FF for more than half an hour. I just don’t like the fighting style. Also, I’m a fan of awesome video game plot lines, but when it takes up most of the time, I have a problem. I’ve seen this guy around, though, and I’ve always thought he looks cool and mysterious. I have to hand it to this series; they really know how to attract the female crowd. Anyway, if you’re a fan of Final Fantasy, you’re in luck, because there will be a lot more of it coming up.

 

 

9. Next up is the good-looking Balthier–also from Final Fantasy. If this were my list, I would place him higher out of these ten, but whatever. The people have spoken. I don’t like his shoes, though. They make him look like a 15th century jester. And what’s he doing with his hand? Is his finger broken or is he beckoning the viewer to come closer? Kind of weird… And don’t even get me started on his tight pants.

 

8. Now that’s hot. Looks like the Internet actually has good taste for once. This is Leon Kennedy from Resident Evil, which I also haven’t played. I like the little emo hair look he’s got going there. I dig guys with emo hair (not to be confused with actual emos; I just like the hair).

 


 

7. Coming in way too high on this list at number 7, we have Tidus from Final Fantasy (yes, again). No, he’s not gay. And… That’s all I wanted to say about him (not a big fan).

 

 

 

6. This is Snake from Metal Gear Solid–yet another game I haven’t played. Hmm, I should start playing some of these games if they’ve got such hot guys. Snake always reminded me of Sam Fisher from Splinter Cell, so I’ve grown to have a deep respect for the Metal Gear Solid series. That’s on my list of things to play on a rainy day.

 

 

 

5. Yet again, another Final Fantasy character. This one is Sephiroth, the evil villain dude who does dastardly deeds. Every girl falls for the bad boy, so it’s not that surprising that an antagonist would make the list. What I can’t understand is the reason our number 5 looks like he’s never heard of Super Cuts! I mean, I like guys with long hair, but dang! He’s like a freaking male Rapunzel!

 

4. This handsome young man is Squall from, you guessed it, Final Fantasy. Check out that awesome gun sword! Does it shoot blades? Or does he have to pull the trigger to swing it? I don’t know, I’m not a Final Fantasy person.

 

 

 

3. Now this is an attractive person. I’ve always had a crush on the characters with the white hair (except for Sephiroth; the only thing more ridiculous than the length of his hair is the length of his sword). I don’t know what it is about it, but I love that white hair. Plus, it’s an emo cut! Yay!

Anyway, the awesome white hair belongs to Dante from Devil May Cry and guess what? I haven’t played it. Now that I’ve seen this white-haired wonder, maybe I’ll pick it up.

 

 

2. Since there seems to be so many Final Fantasy fans, of course Cloud would make the list. From his golden spikes to his chiseled abs, this is one hot cartoon. One sad thing about him, though: I heard he never smiles. Aww, cheer up, Cloud! You’re good-looking, and all the girls love you!

 

 

 

1. I am glad that the character in first place is deserving of such a title. Now, the hero of Hyrule can happily roam the roads of Castle Town knowing that not only did he save a princess as well as the whole world, but he is also the hottest guy the video game industry has to offer. I’m sure Zelda’s pretty psyched about it, too.

In case you didn’t know, this is Link from The Legend of Zelda. And yes, I have played this one.

 

 

So there you have it: the 10 video game guys worth having a crush on, according to the Internet. Now it’s your turn to post who you think should or shouldn’t have made the list.

 

And in case you’re at all curious, here’s my top 5:

1. Altair from Assassin’s Creed

2. Link from The Legend of Zelda

3. Carth from Knights of the Old Republic

4. Sam Fisher from Splinter Cell

5. Pit from Super Smash Bros. (it’s the wings)

 

Oh yeah, there’s one more thing I wanted to add. Some Japanese guy actually married a video game character. Crushes are one thing, but that’s definitely taking it too far. For a link to the video, click here.

I was talking to my friend Lisa the other day, and she inquired, “Am I a nerd?” Before I could respond, she said that she couldn’t be a geek because, and I quote: “geeks eat chickens.” There was a small pause as I was attempting to wrap my head around the ridiculousness of what she just said. Then I broke out laughing, and she began to explain to me that her definition was in the dictionary. I promised that I’d look it up later on the Merriam-Webster website, so here I am, finding the definition of a geek, as well as discovering how it differs from a nerd.

 

Well, I looked up the definition on m-w.com, and it says, “ a carnival performer often billed as a wild man whose act usually includes biting the head off a live chicken or snake.” So Lisa’s claim wasn’t far off, but this description is no longer applicable in today’s society, thus rendering definition number 1 completely useless.

 

Other definitions on sites like m-w.com and dictionary.com show that nerds and geeks are virtually the same. Even in the place for synonyms, each word has the other listed. In my opinion, these dictionary definitions are absolutely true. There is no difference between a nerd and a geek, no matter how worked up people get over using these words interchangeably.

 

My skepticism is drawn from the fact that the Internet cannot agree with itself (alert the press!). Just take a look at these two Venn diagrams. First of all, I’d like to say that it’s pretty amusing that multiple people actually made Venn diagrams on this subject, but then again, they would have to be nerds themselves to have made these, so it’s understandable. Anyway, the diagrams aren’t completely off, but they aren’t in agreement either.

 

To be fair, most of the descriptions from blogs and nerdy websites say that nerds are geared toward a high level of interest in science, and geeks are labeled hardcore fans of things like Star Trek and video games. They can’t seem to make up their mind on which one is associated with computers.

 

The worst article on attempting to describe the difference came from WikiHow. Under “Nerd,” it says, “A nerd could be viewed as someone with an extremely intense interest or fascination in an academic field of study.” Under “Geek,” it says, “It is not uncommon for a geek to be capable of reciting large amounts of knowledge.” These definitions are not the same thing, of course, but they are very close. Furthermore, under “Nerd,” it says, “Nerd interests may cover a broad range of interests, from movies to games (video and table-top), to more practical skills such as computer science.” And under “Geek:” “Geeks can vary in their interests, from fun (films) and sometimes even frivolous things (collecting plastic figurines), to heavily technological interests (computing, hacking, and programming).” The two sentences are virtually the same thing! The article can’t even agree with itself!

 

Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

What is Wrong with These People?!

I never knew Facebook games were so popular! I mean, look at that! CityVille is right under Black Ops! You’re telling me that a Facebook game, that has no awesome FPS game play, no voice option for online gaming, and consists of doing the same freaking thing over and over again every single day, has more players and makes more money than Halo: Reach?! What is wrong with this world?! Play a real game, people! Argh, this makes me angry.

 

And that’s all I have to say about that. I’m so depressed, I’m going to go play Halo: Reach now and make it 4.5 million and 1 players. Click here for a real article about this crap.